GOOD BYE LOVE :'(
Wednesday 21 December 2011 | 07:13 | 0 hearts♥
hmm~ today is the SUCK and BAD day for me.
did you guys saw that picture?
I already broke up with him :'(
sy memang tidak mau break sama dia. tapi apa boleh buat. lah kan?
I have my own reason why I leave him.
sy bukan sengaja2 mau kasih tinggal dia begitu.
tapi bersebab kenapa sy buat begitu.
mau tau kenapa?
because I hurt his feeling too much :((
selalu kasih kecewa dia and buat dia marah2.
I feel guilty.
actually memang tidak sanggup mau buat dia begitu.
but, I have to.
supaya dia tidak lagi sakit hati gara2 perangai sy ne.
sedih betul hati mau kasih tinggal dia ne.
he's the only one for me.
he always be there for me.
he loves me for who I am.
but, I don't know why sometimes I think that I'm not good enough for him.
just now, he texts me and keep calls me.
dia balik2 tanya betul ka mau break?
berat hati betul sy mau jawab.
dengar dari cara dia bercakap tadi pun buat sy betul2 rasa sedih.
he really2 don't want let me go.
it's been two hour I cried.
this is the first time in my life I cried like this.
tidak pernah jadi ne dalam hidup sy time sama2 ex2 yang lain.
dari tadi nangis, nangis, nangis dan nangis sampai bengkak mata.
suara pun lain2 suda :'/
semua sebab dia.
maybe this is the good way for both of us, me and him.
supaya dia tidak lagi sakit hati gara2 sy ne :')
I still will wait for him, no matter how long times will take.
because he's the only one that I want.
mau cakap sorry dengan dia pun sudah terlambatkan.
terlanjur cakap mana boleh tarik balik.
asalkan dia happy lepas ne, sy pun happy jugalah untuk dia.
harap dia jumpa orang yang lebih bagus dari sy.
tadi pun sampai ramai yang tanya kenapa dengan hubungan kami.
sy binggung mau jawab.
berat mulut ne mau cerita sama dorang.
semua dorang care pasal relationship kami.
tapi tidak tau kenapa begini.
tiada jodoh ka kalau begitu?
tidak perlu lah sy kasih tau dorang kenapa. biarlah sy sendiri simpan ne semua.
tidak mau menyusahkan orang lain ataupun kasih libat2 orang lain dalam ne hal.
dia pernah cakap, dia bilang dia percaya hubungan kami ne boleh pgi jauh.
8 bulan, 3 minggu dan 3 hari hubungan kami bertahan semenjak 27 march 2011.
sy bersyukur dengan Tuhan sebab kasih sy peluang kenal sama dia.
dialah orang pertama yang boleh buat sy sampai begini gila.
dialah orang pertama yang pernah buat sy bahagia begini.
when I was with him, I feel so safe. so comfortable in his arms.
his hug is my favorite one.
I'm gonna miss his smile, his voice, his kiss, his hug and everything about him.
I know I can't live without him, but I need to keep move on right?
I need learn how to let him go like everybody ever do :(
It's so hard to let him go, but I need to be strong for him.
I will always pray for him.
I will never regret gave my heart for him.
he deserve it.
I will take a good care this 'love' that he already gave me.
I really2 appreciate for everything that he've done for me and this relationship.
my feeling can't describe by words.
he ask me to delete his picture, number and semua yang ada kaitan dengan dia.
but, I will keep it.
all the memory that we've been share and create together, I will keep in on my mind.
I never forget that.
I'm so sorry for hurting you too much my love.
I didn't meant it.
please forgive me okay? :(
macam orang cakap, "kalau ada JODOH, kamu tetap sama2 juga tu."
so, I believe that.
kalau betul kami tiada JODOH pun, apa boleh buat lah kan?
asalkan kami still jadi kawan.
yang penting sy masih boleh nampak dia tersenyum :)
banyak sudah dia sabar dengan gaya sy.
kami sama2 janji akan ubah gaya yang tidak menyenangkan.
tapi ada seja halangan.
sy pun tidak faham kenapa.
sebagai perempuan, memang sy jealous a.k.a. sakit mata nampak kalau ada perempuan menggatal sama dia.
lebih2 lagi kalau perempuan tu memang gaya lain.
begitu juga dengan dia.
dia ne memang kuat jealous.
sy suka tu gaya dia yang begitu, sebab sy tau dia sayang sy :)
tapi kadang2 boleh buat kami gaduh.
gaduh2 manja lah orang katakan.
biasalah kalau lumrah hidup orang bercinta kan?
if I can turn bak the times, I won't make that mistake.
but, what can I do right?
tunggu dan lihat seja lah macam mana nanti.
kalau betul2 masih sayang, dia cari juga tu.
sy tau memang sy bersalah. tapi bukan 100% salah sy seja.
masing2 ada salah. ada salah faham yang buat kami sampai jadi begini.
slalunya kalau kami gaduh2, tidak berlayan sampai brapa hari, confirm dia cari balik.
then, masing2 minta maaf.
after that okay sudah balik. manja2 sudah balik lagi.
awlolo~ so sweet that time.
I still remember when he try to make me happy and smile again.
dia banyak cara mau kasih happy sy.
sy suka dengar cerita2 gila dia.
ketawa kami sampai tidak peduli orang2 sekeliling.
erghh! I miss that moment :(
okaylah, thats all I wanna share tonight.
need to take a rest and relaxing my mind.
mata pun bengkak habis sudah ne.
I hope when I wake up tomorrow morning, this thing didn't really happen.
I hope it just a dream, I mean bad nightmare :/
anyway, a lots thanks to him.
he light up my day everyday.
I hope he will be okay there.
21 December 2011, I'll never forget that date.
the day I lost my precious one.
GOOD BYE, MOHD DIDIO :(
Labels: broken heart, can't forget him, cry, need to be strong and life must go on, sadness, still wait for him.